Early morning post after a sleepless night

It's exactly 5 AM in the morning and here I am sitting on my bed while writing this. I am not an early bird, so obviously, I have had another one of those sleepless nights. Its an irony for someone like me, who loves sleep having a sleepless night.

I tried to sleep after turning off the lights and the laptop at 1 AM but ended up spending an hour tossing around in bed. Despite sleeping in a dark room with my eyes tightly closed, I felt like I was outside in bright daylight. After much trying, I thought a soothing music would lull me to sleep, so I played music on my ipad and while I hugged onto it, I tried to get myself to help the music to lull me to sleep. Sleep did not visit me still and after three hours of listening to music and an hour of tossing around in bed, here I am giving up on inviting sleep.

A night without sleep makes me weary the next day and today is sure going to be one of those days, when I feel so weak and weary and the vision becomes blurred. Those days are tough and today shall also be one. No doubt!

As I sit here, I can hear a cricket outside, it probably has been chirping the whole night but I can hear it loud and clear now. I was taught that crickets chirp to signal the end of summer. Summer has been long gone. September and August are gone as well but the crickets are still chirping. They apparently are confused with the kind of weather this year had had. Last year, at this time of the year, winter was already here but this year summer went away so late. Effects of global warming a friend of mine told me a few days ago. The heat lasted till the first weeks of October. Just a week ago, a slight rain brought the temperature down. Now we have to wear warm clothes even while in the room with the fan switched off. From 42ºC to 17ºC, its amazing, how a place can have such a vast change in temperature in but just a twelve months time. God sure is very creative. :D
Another 30-40 minutes and the sun will be up and bright but since the day of rainfall, the weather here has been a little cloudy, with very less penetration of sun rays through the thick layers of clouds. Cold days unlike any other days makes me miss Bhutan more. Bhutan must almost be freezing by now, especially Thimphu with the snow already reaching Phajoding. Can't wait to be home and fight the cold along with my folks. Going to school must be getting harder for my little ones at home. Having to wake up early in the cold and walking to school must be a torture by now. :( Pool little ones. 

The dark shade outside is getting lighter. Morning calls started, with the birds taking over the job of chirping from the cricket. I can no longer hear the cricket; it probably retreated into it's nest for the well deserved rest. I hope it doesn't have a sleepless day like I had a sleepless night. Now, its the job of the birds to keep the day busy, while the crickets rests. When the sun comes up, I shall go up to the terrace to watch this semester's last sunrise. And if possible get a few pictures clicked, just hoping the sun comes up today.
6 o'clock! Time to rush to the bathroom and wash myself fast, so that I make it on time to watch the sunrise. Have a good day! :)

How often do we thank our parents?

Spending time alone with your parents is sheer joy. Every time I get free time I sit with my father either talking to him or reading a book with him. Losing a parent has taught me the real value of parents and I make it a point that I never lose time while I have it to be with the only one I am left with. So I usually prefer being left alone with him rather than attending some function happening at a neighbor’s or going for a movie.

It was one such time when I was at home a few weeks ago. I and my father were the only ones at home. After lunch we were sitting outside in the sun, when he wanted to take bath and I told him I will prepare hot water for his bath. It took me about half an hour to heat up the water and prepare the water for his bath. As I was almost done preparing the water, I asked him to get a towel and get into the bath. After a few minutes, he emerged out of his room with a towel and some clothes to be changed into. I told him the water was ready in the bathroom. He said, “Thank you”. A mere ‘thank you’ by a grateful father to his daughter but that brought back memories of my own childhood. Each time I needed to take a bath, my father would always heat up the water and reach it till the bathroom. All I had to do was take a towel and take bath. As I reached back into those memories, I didn’t remember ever thanking my father for the deed. Preparing the water for my bath is but just a minor part of the things he has done for me and my siblings, apart from that there are a lot of greater things that my father has done for us but then I never thanked him for any of those. In fact I don’t remember ever thanking my parents for anything they did for me.

Likewise, it had me thinking about how many children of my age and the ones older than me would have thanked their parents. I suppose, kids these days thank their parents for things they do for them. For example, my niece who is in the sixth standard this year thank her mother every time after getting her mother’s help with her homework and she thank her father for things he does for her. Modernization and education have brought both the kids and the parents to the next level. I do not mean that the older generations have not been educated. There are those who are highly educated but their parents are not. So, even if the kids thank their parents it would be of less value as the parents would not understand it in the first place. Secondly, even if the kids thank the parents, then they are bound by the stereotypical thinking of the people. While the educated knows, what it means, when the kids thank their parents, people in the villages understand it less. I suppose this is one reason why the kids don’t thank their parents even when they are thankful.

I am not sure, what was the reason behind me not thanking my parents for anything they did for me though I was thankful for those deeds. I now often think, was it the surrounding that I was brought up in or was it the elders that I followed that had that effect on me? Though I have been brought up in both urban and rural places, I have not had that experience of meeting someone like myself thanking their parents. And they may not have done so as they like me may not have met someone who would thank their parents. And the elders may not have thanked their parents because their elders did not do so. So it probably comes from times immemorial. But now I can see the change happening. And even I make started thanking my father for everything he does for me. It was happiness I experienced. That, ‘thank you’ was another gift my father gave me. I learned, what it is like to be thanking my father for what he does for me. Otherwise my parents would never have known how thankful I am to them.

Thank you Apa and Ama. I am glad you are my parents. I love you guys. :)

If money can buy me a time machine

If money can buy me a time machine
I would not mind begging in the streets
I need to go, visit my past
Spend some quality time with my Ama
I can never have enough of her
Leaving her would break my heart
So I am going to bring her here
Only if money can buy me a time machine!

If money can buy me a time machine
I would not mind robbing even the poor
I got to go, visit my past
Have a few things to straighten
A few spoken words to be taken back
Some mistakes to be undone
And a lot of beautiful memories to be made
Only if money can buy me a time machine!

If money can buy me a time machine
I would not mind stealing from the rich
I have got to go, visit the future
To make sure nothing goes wrong
Learn about it and come back
So that I can be prepared
Protecting loved ones would be much easier
Only if money can buy me a time machine!

Humanity showed up once again.

We live in a world, where almost no one has time for the other person. Life gets busier by the day and we have no time to spare. Humanity is lost and wealth and fame has become the priority of our lives and it almost seems like it is the reason we live for. Money really talks like everyone says. You have money, you have everything and you don’t have it, you have nothing. Just nothing at all! “Everything comes with price tags”, I was once taught in my Torts class. Even emotions have price tags, otherwise there wouldn't be people marrying for money. The world has become more materialistic than, what it used to be once upon a time. Sad but a fact it is! These days fame and money makes humans and it is as if humans live without emotions.

Even while everyone is busy earning money, piling it up in their bank accounts or either buying comforts, which they obviously are not able to enjoy, humanity shows up its face. The perfect timing to remind everyone of us, of the fact, that we are humans. We still need one another to live and most importantly to live peacefully. It is then that we realize how important it is to help eachother but that realization is also short lived. Anyhow it is better than never realizing. It atleast restores humanity once in awhile.

Recently a post with a picture of a patient has been going around on Facebook with the message, "My daughter Sangay Lhaden, who is in CMC Vellore, is in need of blood. Anyone in and around Vellore willing to save her life by donating blood may please contact me at 0091**********." Humanity lent its hand in helping the helpless father, who had come to a foreign land with the hope of getting his daughter cured of the disease; everyone, who saw the post, started sharing the post, eventually reaching those students studying in Chennai and Coimbatore area. They probably called up the patient’s father and got the blood group confirmed. Another post came up again after a few days on the timeline of the patient’s father; this time it was a picture of a number of boys sitting in the waiting room of a hospital with the caption, "14 Bhutanese students in Chennai and Coimbatore came to Vellore to donate blood for my daughter in times of need. I thank them all." Humanity restored! These men, who visited the hospital to donate blood for the patient by taking timeout of their busy schedule really made everyone, who saw the post believe that, humanity exists still, somewhere, somehow.

Students who came up to the hospital to donate blood, in the process of doing so. Sangay's father writes, "Bhutanese students from Chennai donating platelets for my daughter in CMS Hospital. There are no words to to thank them." Photo Courtesy: Facebook.

The sense of belonging to eachother is the reason they were there. Being a Bhutanese, I feel proud to know that our people never leave another countryman at times of need. Going through those posts, I had goose bumps on my skin. A feeling indescribable crept in me and I thought out loud, “This is how Bhutanese are”. At home or away from home, we are always ready to lend a helping hand for our country man. And the patient is now probably a little better from, what she used to be because I saw a post by her father. I hope she gets better soon and gets back home safe. Everybody back home must be waiting so impatiently. Speedy recovery, Sangay. Take care!

To my father

In a tiny hamlet far away
Where meandering path leads the way
And nature is at its best
At the alluring place which I call 'home'
Dwells my strength, my father
While collecting the memories together
Dearly, he clings upon them
A few happy-sad, bitter-sweet moments
The contents of his life
A life that had been selflessly dedicated
To the mouths that had to be fed
To the bodies that had to be clothed
Role of a father he excelled
Keeping the love alive even after she left
His love unparalleled
He is an exemplar of a true husband
Survivor of a tough life
Strong and sturdy he still stands
Role of a man he excelled
Chased by old age, his hair grey
Our lives, made his prey
The man who is my strength, my father
His sacrifice I never can repay
Good health I pray be his now and ever

p.s. I love you, Apa.

Liebster award for my blog

Let me start by thanking Sherab Tenzin for nominating my blog for the liebster award. It is an honor to be a recipient of the blog award, this one being the first blog award I ever received. I am glad you nominated my blog. As I was occupied with some academic work I could not put up the answers as soon as the award was received, until today. I apologize for the late answers.

In the past I did not have a clue about the existence of such an award for a blog and when I did I realized that I was falling short of the meaning. I initially googled for the meaning and learned that it several meanings “dearest, sweetest, kindest, nicest, beloved, kind, pleasant, values, cute, endearing, welcome and sweetheart”. The meaning somehow interested me. Also just with the meaning and the idea that I have to answer the set of questions that has been asked to me, I did not know how to go on with the post. So I started a little research online which led me to some well written blogs with blog posts regarding the award. As far as my understanding goes after reading some of those posts, liebster award evolved like a chain letter, which needs to be passed from one to the other blog. Earlier it was also held that the blog of anyone who received the award and ignored it vanished mysteriously. And that probably was the reason why the bloggers passed on the award. In the present day, though the character of passing the award by one recipient to the other still exists, the intention is different. It is so done aiming at discovering new blogs.

Having read about the award, I learnt that the blog which receives the award is supposed to put up a post containing a description of the award, the answers to the questions, Nominate any numbers of blogs for the award and ask the nominated blogs the same set of questions or a set of self-framed questions based on ones interest.

Photo courtesy; Google

Answers to Sherab's questions

1/ Who inspired you to blog?

Answer: I have never had an idea about the existence of something called 'blog' before I joined college. The first blog I read was Langa Tenzin's blog, which contains a huge number of posts, all beautiful. That gave me an idea that one can actually maintain a diary like thing online. Then I came across Sangay Duba's blog and Sherab Tenzin's blog , both containing a lot of inspiring articles. Those are the blogs that inspired me to blog.  And now that I am already a blogger, I get to read a lot many blogs. Thanks to them.

2/ How you remain active in blogging?

Answer: I ain't an active blogger, I update my blog only once in a while when something inspires me or when an idea strikes my mind. But even when I don't post on my blog, I remain active at blogging by reading the blogs that I have discovered.

3/ A quote that guides your life?

Answer: I am not a person who sticks to one thing for a long time. Thus I don't have any quote by anyone, which guides my life. I like many of them though.

4/ What you do if your blog is declared as the highest viewed blog in the world?

Answer: I would obviously be so happy if ever my blog is rated as the highest viewed blog and also I would strive harder to keep my readers entertained as they would then expect a little more from me.

5/ What you do during leisure?

Answer: I am a regular facebooker, every leisure time I get, I am into facebook. If ever you can't contact me, make sure you check me on facebook. Haha. Other than that I watch movies, talk with friends or either hang out with them.

6/ The book which you think shouldn't be read next time?

Answer: Now, this is one tough question. I have liked every book that I read. So no exact answer for this  question.

7/ Inspirational dialogues from one of the movies you watched recently?

Answer: "I wouldn't kill him because he looked as frightened as I was. I looked at him, and I saw myself." from the animated movie, "How to train your dragon".

8/ In your view, what makes a person smart/beautiful?

Answer: Well, for me the heart of a person comes first. One should have a beautiful heart to be beautiful. A heart that feels and cares. To sum up everyone with the five vital organs and possessing a heart that loves and cares is a beautiful person for me.

9/ The most embarrassing moment of your life?

Answer: The most embarrassing moment of my life was in 2010. I was then a school councillor and we, me and my co-councillor, had to stand on a platform infront of the assembly every morning, from where my co-councillor would give command to the students. One day my co-councillor could not come to school as he was down with cold. I was to give command to the students then. When it was time for the command to be given I was stuck. My principal who would stand a few meters away from us started calling me but then no words would come out of my mouth. Every eyes were on me and I was petrified. When I finally did after about ten minutes, my pronunciations went wrong.

10/ Your thoughts on some people considering bloggers as 'thought leaders' in this century?

Answer: I agree with their thought. Bloggers these days are indeed "thought leaders". They have a huge pile of articles on their blog and keep adding on them with the topics that the world need to know about. The contemporary as well as the historic issues are discussed widely in the blogs and with the century already being one full of modern technologies, the articles written are broadly spread. People who blog are well informed themselves and inform the world of the same as well.

My Nominees are:
1/ Namgay Om
2/ Chukuu
3/ Jigme Gyeltshen

The questions for my nominees are:

1/ What is your greatest dream and do you intend to reach for it?

2/ What makes you the most happiest?
3/ What is the craziest thing you did?
4/ When you read a blog, what do you expect from the writer?
5/ Given a chance what is that one thing that you would change?
6/ What would your dream vacation be like?
7/ What person, in any place or time period, would you trade places with for a day? Why?
8/ Tell us something that we don't know about you.
9/ A place you have been yearning to visit?
10/ Finally, the reason you blog?

I hope you will accept my nomination. Happy blogging!

p.s Sorry for not linking your blogs to the nominee names. I haven't learnt it yet and when I do, I promise, I will link it to your blog.

waste

Tick, Tock, Tick, Tock
The hands of the clock moved
Lost in thoughts, the lesson ended
Without answers, the job interview ended
Education and time wasted!

As I wake up today, I am dead.

As I wake up today, I am dead. My body is stiff and I am no longer breathing, while my soul is looking at it and trying to make it get up. My skin is pale. It must have been a while since I stopped breathing. My wife and mother of my two kids is sleeping beside my cold and immobile body. She is unaware of my state. How long will it be before she discover?
The alarm goes off and she opens her eyes slowly. As usual, she is turning over to my side and embracing me. At the touch of my cold skin she recoils, a small shriek  escapes her lip. I can see fear in her eyes and thoughts of a shaky future whizzing through her mind.
Her hand's inching forward again, propelled by a dying hope. She nudges me, shakes me harder and then the first tear rolls down her rosy cheeks. Her cries are agitating our baby who is sleeping so innocently in peace which may continue for some years till questions about me rise in his mind.
Woken up by her mother's cries, my little daughter is at our bedroom door, trying to rub sleep out of her eyes, her hand clutching on the curtain. She is walking closer and sees her mother crying and then looks at me. She comes near and gives me a kiss on the cheek, which would usually make me wake up and pull her in a bear hug. When it doesn't happen, she does it again. I try to lift my hands, but not a finger moves. I want to hug her like always and listen to her giggles, when I hug her but I no more hear her giggle. I can just hear her silent sobs.
By noon there are a whole lot of people. I can feel the moisture of tears in the air. I now lie on a table in a tent outside my house. Covered in white cloth, on a thin carpet. A wall of yellow cloth is built around me. People come into the tent, solemn, some holding back tears, some bland, some crying out their eyes. My wife is sitting outside the 'yellow wall'. My son is on her lap and my daughter is sitting next too her. I wish to see them only, I want my wife not to cry but she won't stop.
My son is crying now, he is probably startled by all these people. I can hear someone walking around, with him cradled in her arms, trying to calm him down. That is not going to work; he can sleep only when we are silent and still. I found this out when he was two months old when my wife and I had so many sleepless nights.
It's already been a week now. I can see all the family members present. Numbers of gelongs and gomchen comes to my house daily and pray so many prayers infront of me and in my house. I pray that they pray for a trail free after-life. I know that I will have to leave physically too. To a new home and I am too scared to even think of what's waiting for me there.
I am naked now. Some people are washing my body. My shame doesn't bother them as I am now just another dead body for them. They dress me up handsomely and adorn me and take me to a place where there is a stack of woods. They place me on the ground on a carpet again. Face covered with a yellow scarf.
Soon men in my family enters the scene and says it's time. My girl stands there, silently looking on. My wife comes near me, lifts the scarf covering my face and takes a last look at it. Drops of her tears wet my cheeks as she stares into my face. Then her mother holds her back as they lift me. They shift me from the carpet onto the stack of woods.
I am on a stack of woods now. There's the smell of freshly cut trees in the air. They start stacking more woods upon me, slowly, as if they know that I can feel it. One if them nudges me with a long stick and positions me. I can no longer see my family properly.
I can hear someone say, light it. The smell of fire. Its's becoming hotter. My body catches fire and a man keeps poking me with a stick and it's hurting me. You may think I am dead, but it hurts. As the fire slowly eats away my body, I can hear my wife crying out loud. She needs to be strong, for our kids. It is no longer in my power to protect them now. I can just watch over them. Now I can hear footsteps walking away, leaving me here. My  body no longer exists. I am just a soul and ash.
My ashes have been left here for three days now. A few men collects them onto some bags on the third day. They carry it on their backs and places them in a vehicle . Crying, my wife waves a white scarf. The vehicle is moving. This is the last my family will see anything of me. They sprinkle my ashes into the river. I am leaving. Alone!

Thank you 2013, favour me 2014

Dear 2013, you have been a beautiful year and thank you for that. Let 2014 know that I expect nothing less than you from it.

photo courtesy: Google

"Can't believe Earth completes a revolution every year so that you guys could party..!!", I saw a status on the wall of one of my facebook friend. As I read that line I realized that it indeed is a true thing. The earth completes a revolution and the people on earth starts celebrating. The hope to have a better year compared to the one that has already been spent awakens the spirit in each one of us. Celebrations and parties happening everywhere. Wishes for a happy year passing from one to another. The past forgotten despite what it had brought with it.

Another year has just passed by in a blink and I am growing a year older with the celebration of a new year. I am growing old but a new year also brings so much hope with it so I am pushing away the thought of me getting older. 2013 hasn't been a bad year unlike some of the years in my life. It taught me new things, gave me new friends and more importantly it gave me the strength to pull through it. And finally it's bidding me goodbye. Thank you 2013 for the being a beautiful year and letting me and the ones around me live peacefully. I admit that there has been a few of those 'scary' moments but those hasn't been enough to cover up all of those happy ones. I am glad I survived those moments. Now that I have made it till the the end, I am looking forward to 2014 to be a year far better than 2013.

The first day of the new year 2014 and I suppose most of the people out there have one or many resolutions for themselves but I have none. I never had one till date. I sat thinking about having a resolution this year but then I landed up having nothing in my mind. I could think of nothing to change about myself and my life. I concluded the effort with the thought that I am good the way I am now. And if ever there is a need to change anything about myself I have not much of a problem to change it right away. So that is how I have not even a single new year resolution.

A day of a new year is almost ending and I sit here writing and hoping I have another beautiful year. I wish 2014 would protect my family and friends like 2013 did. May it bless us with less of worries and lesser of ill health. I hope 2014 will be a year filled with happiness for me, for my family and friends and for the world.

HAPPY NEW YEAR, 2014!!!